[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from Wednesday, Oct 15, 2008 I shouldn’t have looked in her diary, but maybe it’s best that I did. Dear Cary, This summer, my girlfriend went to Central America for three months. She was in spotty contact with me the whole time, saying it was difficult to...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from Wednesday, Oct 12, 2005 How can someone so special on the Internet be such a drag in real life? Dear Cary, I have this friend. Let’s call her Susan. Susan and I became friends online several years ago, through mutual (in person) friends. For several...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from TUESDAY, OCT 9, 2007 I’ve been a cheater since my very first boyfriend and no one has ever found out. Cary, I am a cheater. I’ve never had a boyfriend or husband that I didn’t cheat on. When I was younger, it would just be making out behind a boyfriend’s back;...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from FRIDAY, JUL 8, 2005 I fathered a child when I was a screwed-up loser and kept it secret all these years. Dear Cary, Boy, did I screw up. About 13 years ago, I fell for a friend of my sister’s and got her pregnant. I was at this point in my life a loser. I had...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from SUNDAY, OCT 17, 2010 We grew up differently. I got great guidance from parents and friends. He kind of drifted. Now he’s in a tough spot Dear Cary, I have something of a quandary with a friend of mine. He’s my oldest friend, we’ve known each other since we were...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from THURSDAY, JUN 9, 2005 I know he would have wanted to give me more money, but his will left everything to her. Dear Cary, I’m 34. My father passed away a year and half ago. He remarried when I was 15 but started dating my stepmom (SM) when I was 9. Dad and SM...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from THURSDAY, DEC 13, 2007 We have three small children and I am devastated. Hi, I need desperate help, please. My husband died of cancer a week ago. The day after his funeral, I learned he’d been having Internet sex, which didn’t stop there. He met up with...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from WEDNESDAY, MAR 19, 2003 I want my husband to write a letter to my future lovers, telling them that the demise of our marriage was his fault. Dear Cary, I don’t always agree with you, but I do think you are compassionate and nonjudgmental, two of the most...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from Wednesday, Sep 12, 2007 What is she doing at my parents’ house when I’m not there? Dear Cary, I’ve known my best friend for 22 years, since we were 10. We grew up right across the street from each other. It has been one of those great...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from Tuesday, Aug 7, 2007 I thought they were my friends, but they’ve been laughing at me all this time! Dear Cary, About a year ago I found out that five of the people on my campus, including my freshman roommate and a bunch of people I thought were my...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from Wednesday, Oct 20, 2004 He screwed my 17-year-old sister on my wedding night, and threatened to have my kneecaps broken! Dear Cary, I live in a Scandinavian country. I moved here a little over a year ago to be with my love and recently got married...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from Tuesday, Jun 26, 2012 I can’t afford to go plus I dread seeing my mean, stupid ex and his shiny new whatever Hi Cary, My question is simple, but the back story is complicated. A very good, old friend of mine is getting married this fall. She...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Hi Cary, I am seeing a great guy, but things have recently become very ambiguous between us and I’m not sure the best course of action for me. We were dating for a little over two months, it was a slowly deepening fantastic and mature relationship, and I care for him...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from Thursday, Apr 28, 2011 Since they got suddenly rich, all they talk about is how hard it is to get good help Hi, Cary – In a nutshell, the problem is that my three best friends have all inherited substantial money in the past two years. My husband and I...
Judith, abstract expressionist, El Farolito on 24th Street in the Mission for lunch after the meeting, talking about William James, the God thing, William James says, Look, we are scientific men, Christian men, honest men, and we cannot deny what we see: People are having experiences; they have these experiences of another world and then they change. What are we to call this? How can we, as...
Am I doing it right? [button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Dear Reader, When I was writing the Since You Asked advice column for Salon.com, I often would meander from the “given” form in ways that some readers found aesthetically displeasing. They were experiencing genre shock. (As though...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Cary’s classic column from Apr 20, 2007 Accidents happen. He was inexperienced. But he’s not owning up. In fact he’s sort of acting like a dick! Cary, My longtime boyfriend and I went on a holiday in Colorado with a bunch of others, which included ice-climbing practice. My...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Dear Cary, I have been reading your column, particularly your relationship advice for so long that sometimes the stories mirror my own hopelessly romantic life with such accuracy I’m convinced a significant other wrote it. Thank you for sharing your insight in...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Hello Cary, I am writing on how to think about a new situation. Some background: I briefly “dated” a man back in 2005. It was a long distance thing since I met him on a trip in another country, so for better or worse, we were as best friends. When our...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Dear Cary, About seven months ago, I was coming out of a really bad relationship with a younger guy who was an immature, boring freeloader. He also cheated on me with men and women, indiscriminately. As long as he was receiving attention, he was happy. After breaking...
Hi Cary, I am a big fan of your column. I am writing to ask you for your advice about a best friendship I have — or had, rather. We are 30-year-old women and when we met in middle school we became instant friends. Though we went to separate high schools and universities, we lived close enough that we hung out all through the years at least twice a month, often sleeping over at...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Dear Cary, I am writing to you because I feel like I have landed myself in a situation where it is impossible for me to maintain either my happiness or my integrity, and I am hoping that you will be able to give some firm yet sympathetic advice. I have often read your column when it was...
[button link=”mailto:[email protected]” newwindow=”yes”] Write for Advice[/button] Classic column from Tuesday, March 14, 2006 During the blizzard, I refused to shelter my friend There were other places he could go, and I wanted to be alone with my boyfriend. Dear Cary, At 8 a.m. on Sunday, during the height of the recent snowstorm, my significant other...
Judith Lindbloom, abstract expressionist, El Farolito on 24th Street in the Mission for lunch after the meeting, talking about William James, the God thing, William James says, Look, we are scientific men, Christian men, honest men, and we cannot deny what we see: People are having experiences; they have these experiences of another world and then they change. What are we to call this? How can...